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The Oscars Just Had a Doublemint Moment!
Did you hear the news? The L.A. Times reported that the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences are doubling number of best picture nominations to ten! That’s twice as many opportunities to...
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Hardee’s is Lowering America’s Standards in Acceptable Breakfast Items/Clever...
Two birds, one stone. Quite impressive, really. Then again, Hardee’s is nothing if one thing: Do you not believe me? Then just take a gander at their new ad for something they thus far call “biscuit...
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The Final Poster for The Ugly Truth Gives Me a Headache
Sometimes I editorialize images I find on the internet with pithy comments in pink letters. But sometimes there’s an image that speaks entirely for itself. Such is the case of the final poster for...
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Oh Look, a Poster for a Movie I’ll Probably Never See
Traditionally, teaser posters that come out nearly an entire year before their film’s release try to do what their name would imply, which is, you know, TEASE. For example, that fabulous teaser poster...
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Things That Should Not Exist: This Taylor Lautner New Moon Action Figure
Logic dictates that, for a product to exist, there must be a demand. It’s for this reason that products like the Wearable Towel or the Comfort Wipe; they may be incredibly stupid and theoretically...
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How Much Longer Can I Still Refuse to Believe That the Poltergeist Remake Is...
Yesterday, Laura reminded me that MGM is planning to remake Tobe Hooper’s (or, if you believe the rumors, Steven Speilberg’s) 1982 masterpiece, Poltergeist. We all know how I feel about that: The...
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If There’s Any Justice in the World, Seth McFarlane Will Never Win an Emmy
Seth McFarlane wants his show Family Guy to win an Emmy, y’all. He wants it so badly, in fact, that he’s made a YouTube channel where he’s recycled a scene from an old episode, thrown in some poorly...
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DO. NOT. WANT.
Really? REALLY??? I’m not one to take much stock in a story that first emerged from a Twitter feed, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be utterly outraged by the mere thought of it. So here are 140...
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You Haven’t Really Nightmared Until You’ve Nightmared the Nobel Funk Off
I’m not telling you a damn thing about this video other than it’s branded its nightmarish imagery of melted-faced hell spawn deep in my brain, and I’m not about to suffer this one alone: GAAAAAAH! I...
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The New Salt Poster Is All About FACE. Nightmare FACE, That Is
You know, I really have to wonder what’s going on in the marketing department for Salt, because at certain point it stopped seeming like they understood what sort of movie they’re trying to advertise,...
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There’s No Reason for the Butterfinger Buzz to Exist
Did you know that the Butterfinger Buzz claims to be a regular Butterfing with an energy drink’s worth of caffeine in it. They advertise it as a candy bar, and I suppose it is one in so much as that...
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Forget Ben-Hur. This Video is How You Celebrate Easter
As a rule of thumb, I hate the over-baked aesthetics of Guy Ritchie movies. All the shaky camera work and hyper-stylized freeze frames don’t serve a purpose or suggest any real talent. They’re just a...
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Hell No, “Valley Girls”
Once upon a much more innocent and simpler time, I really loved the hell out of Gossip Girl. It was completely absurd, but I loved it so. The plot lines always resolved themselves in a matter of...
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The Boycott Against the Videodrome Remake Begins Today! Long Live the New...
In the past weeks, I’ve oh so gradually begun to rethink my initial and total disgust at the prospect of a Nightmare on Elm Street remake, in large part because of the rather inspired casting of Jackie...
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Not Even a Pound of Cheese Will Convince Me to See X-Men Origins: Wolverine
Have you heard of Papa John’s Pizza’s X-Men Origins: Wolverine promotional tie-in pizza, the XL X-treme Cheese Pizza? It’s an extra-large pizza that purports to have nearly a pound of cheese on it....
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Gerard Butler Will Do Anything for a Klondike Bar
I don’t know about you, but I always think of the first phrase “hot piece” when Gerard Butler comes up. Yes? I tend to prefer my men’s facial hair to be a little more trimmed, but I most certainly...
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Things That Should Not Exist: This Joey Tribbiani Fan Art
I understand that the internet is an incredible tool of connectivity and self-expression. We can share out thoughts, feelings, and creative impulses in a forum unhampered by cultural and geographical...
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Why So Serious(ly Awful), S. Darko?
Back when I saw the trailer for S. Darko, I had high hopes that it was going to be a campalicious train wreck. It seemed to have the pedigree, after all. It’s a straight-to-DVD release, it has a...
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Bestest or Bad Idea?: MoMA’s Tim Burton Retrospective
Did you hear the breaking science news? The Museum of Modern Art’s developed a nuclear-grade nostalgia bomb: on November 22nd, they plan to drop a career-wide Tim Burton retrospective, after which...
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How Can We Save the Bride of Frankenstein Remake from Being the Worst?
When the Bride of Frankenstein met the Frankenstein Monster, she was shocked and horrified. Her iconic scream was the scream of “DO NOT WANT!!!” This is actually quite sad because the time the...
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